Dear Peter and Molly,
I have two teenage sons who are very interested in the young women in our ward. There is one in particular that caught my son's eye, and it's no secret that he harbors a little crush. The girl is very sweet, and sincere, but comes from a less active family, and often seems to have different ideas. This was manifest most recently when she arrived at church and her chest had grown by about at least two cup sizes. She's still a teenager, and I know that sometimes growth spurts happen, but I suspect something a little more surgical. This certainly hasn't ruined my son's interest in her, in fact I heard him telling his brother how 'hot' she looked on Sunday. It feels like none of my business, but I want to at least address the issue with my sons. What can I say?
Warmest,
Mama au Natural
Peter: There is no need to address the issue directly with this girl, but it could be an opportunity to talk about the importance of our bodies in our faith, and proper ways to take care of them. There is no specific church doctrine about plastic surgery, though in October conference seven years ago Elder Holland said, "Fixation on the physical...is more than social insanity; it is spiritually destructive." He was particularly concerned that these fears don't reach our children.
Molly: Mama, I think it's sad that this girl doesn't have the support at home to realize that she was beautiful the way she was, but what she decides to do with her body does not become your business just because your boys ogle her. When her name comes up, change the topic to a recent accomplishment or talent of hers, your boys will understand the point you are trying to make.
Peter: Sure they may understand it, but without addressing the issue in a specific way, the boys will likely just blow their mom's opinion off. I agree that singling her out isn't helpful, but the boys aren't small, they're going to get it if randomly mom brings up plastic surgery.
Molly: That's why she shouldn't bring it up. There is something naturally embarrassing about salivating over a woman's body. Simply correcting her sons will be the equivelant of "My eyes are up here" it will draw attention to their bad behavior. The boys should be able to fix it from there.
If you have any questions e-mail us at PeterMollyAdvice@gmail.com or find us on Facebook
No comments:
Post a Comment