Should They Keep the Cat?

Dear Peter and Molly,
A cat moved into our backyard, my husband shooed the cat away, but he was right back a couple minutes later. He lay under a picnic table in our backyard. The cat has stayed there since. He has been able to catch some food, but I don't like seeing the dead birds and mice that I then have to clean up later. I want to adopt the cat, fix him and feed him, my husband thinks we should take him to a shelter, but I'm terrified that he'll be put down. What do you two think?
Sincerely,
Animal Lover

Dear Animal Lover,
We assume that there are no tags on the animal, and that you've seen no postings for a missing animal, is that correct?
Thanks,
Peter and Molly

That's Right

Peter: I'm not sure what you think that Molly and I can add to this conversation. This is a conversation for a husband and wife to have. Make a deal, or a compromise, tell him how important it is to you, but I can hardly come in and say what is best for your family. If you're simply looking for an outside voice to be a referee, I say that a pet is a big commitment and if one of you doesn't want one, you should probably go without. Many communities have no kill shelters, you can look into finding where the nearest one is to you.

Molly: I'm a huge softy for animals, and this is actually a conversation that we've had in my family. My family decided that it was a perfect time to add a pet, and that it was great providence that one that needed a home just happened to come along. If it's important to you, you don't have to give in just because your husband doesn't want one, unless there is a medical reason he can't. Create a budget and responsibilities list, if you can cover both ends, then have a talk with your husband and tell him the good news. If you need his help caring for the pet, then you need to try and get him on board, but cats are cute, it shouldn't be too hard.

Peter: Adding a pet is a major responsibility, you can't add to your family if your spouse doesn't want to. Money and chores are not the only issues to consider. This is not a matter of one getting the way over the other, it's about mutual respect.

Molly: Yes, so he should respect that she is an adult and can care for a pet if she wants one, and not try and micromanage her life.

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